Pause To Reflect

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.

This line from Kahlil Gibran’s The Prophet should give everyone pause to reflect on the quality of our relationships be it with spouse, children, extended family or friends and associates.

All people crave recognition or expressions of love from the people around them. However, many do not feel compelled to extend the good will they crave to others. Many express having to cope with the continuing pressure of every day life as an excuse for not having the time to really appreciate the loved ones that makes life really worthwhile.

All of us need to take time and pause to reflect on the impact we are having on those that provide our support. Life is far too short to defer expressing love and appreciation.

For many this realization becomes evident in a sudden and unexpected manner. It can start with a phone call from a doctor that has just run some tests for a loved one. Or, it can start with a simple comment from a loved one that the carpet seems to be too squishy. Or, it can start with a simple question such as “ who was the person that just left?” Or it can start when answering the doorbell and finding a police sergeant standing on the porch with a stern expression.

In all cases our time constraints become vividly into focus and are significantly readjusted. Some have time to provide quality-loving care before having to say good by while others do not. In either case the quality of the relationship prior to parting with a loved one plays a significant role in how one is able to cope with life going forward.

The grieving process is normal and will be experienced by all, but the focus of ones grieving should be centered on memories that lead to healing rather on memories that lead to regret. It is up to everyone today to decide how it will be when the time comes. It is not possible to roll back the clock and it is now ticking and will continue to tick.

Richard Stratton